Thursday, October 18, 2007

Intro to Diary of a Mad 40 something woman

Why am I a Mad 40 something woman?..........................

Well 35 is bad, 39 is worse and 40 is the worst. 40 comes and you suddenly realize that theoretically you have more life behind you then you have in front of you! Ackkk…......You start to think of the things you have done and mentally (or to those anal people like me write down a list) check that against the list of things you thought you would have done by this age. And lo and behold the list of things done is not as many as you would like.

In fact, some things are too late to do. Too late you say! Bahhhhh nothing is too late in this day and age you say! Well realistically to have a child biologically really is slim to impossible in your 40s unless you have a lot of money. Most of the cases we see on TV are the exceptions. The lucky ones. Oprah just had a show on troubles people have in becoming parents the other day. Martha Stewart’s daughter, Alexis, was on and talked about her struggles with infertility. Like me she put it off to pursue her career then woke up one day and realized Holy Crap the alarm on my bio clock went of months ago. I better hop to it. You realize you have no one to pass your Mom’s amazing legs to or your beautiful Dad’s eyes :(

Next you realize that your ex, who you left so that you could get in a more fulfilling relationship, can have kids till he drops dead. So now here you are with no kids and no relationship let alone a fulfilling one. WTF?

Then you tell your doctor your fears and she says "Well realistically you have a slim chance and then there is the issue of birth defects with older woman."......ACKKKK Someone wake me from this nightmare.

Society and the media tells me that 30 is the new 40. I look in the mirror and I think I look pretty good. I think I don't look like my Mom when she was 40 but then reality hits you over the head.....ughhhhh

All this is why I'm mad to start with.

Anyone else feel this way?

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